sore thumb

At some point in March when this virus deemed that it had spread so far that it could be called a pandemic, I told the girls they should do video journals to remember the days of living in a pandemic. Here now in the middle of April, I realize that I need to write for myself and the girls can just have lots of regret when they're older because they didn't do what I said. When the whole world started moving to stay-at-home orders, I felt such a strong sense of solidarity.  I looked at all of us (literally all of us - okay, most of us) in our different areas of the world facing this beast together.  Jimmy Fallon's wife filmed him hosting from home.  John Krasinski started SGN in his home office.  Everyone was joking about toilet paper, sweatpants, and cutting your own bangs. Italians were singing from their balconies.  Wuhan folk were singing from their high-rises.  Hospitals in NYC were being surrounded by patrol cars each evening with lights flashing and ...

Somewhere in space are all these posts that people write.  I've had this blog for years now and I hardly ever use it but it's still always here.  Who is that person that finally says, "Okay, enough is enough. Your blog is gone."? I'm tired.  It's Saturday afternoon at 4pm.  I'd like to nap longer or watch a movie.  I don't want to play chu chu train and I don't want to take a slow toddler paced walk outside.  I don't want to start making pizza but I should, which means I need to go buy tomato paste, make the sauce and make the crust.  I'm feeling lazy and a hard thing with being a parent is that when you're lazy, others in your life have the potential to starve. We're looking at buying a house.  It's not an easy thing to do when the house is on one side of the globe while you're on the other.  When I want to get something done, I want it done now.  So, that's making this process hard.  We're at the mercy of east...

It's simply  the break in the clouds the huff up the mountain the cover of yellow leaves the toast of the sun that brings the swell of the spirit.

Well, it's that time again.  The time when I remember that I have a blog and think about writing something. With coffee in hand, I've sat down in front of this screen and, I'm not joking, within seconds Abe is crying in his room.  Fortunately, for me, I can ignore him. We have a mountain behind our apartment.  It's literally behind our apartment.  I walk out the back gate, up a short road and BOOM, there's the mountain.  I like our apartment but I sometimes think about all the other apartment complexes that seem better.  Some are closer to the girl's school. Some have lots of other expat kids that the girls could be out playing with.  But none of them have their very own mountain.  And so, even with the things I'd like to change about this complex, I'm praying we can live here for a long time.  Phil tires to climb the mountain everyday.  I was inspired and I try to climb it every other day - I don't want to get too buff.  I never...

It was still dark when I woke up this morning and thought, "I should get up."  I started sitting up and realized, it's Saturday!  My mornings, Monday thru Friday, start around 6:15am.  It's really not too big of a deal for me since I'm a morning person but when I stay up late with Phil watching Top Chef and Arrested Development, then it's a big deal.  Maddie pretty much has two choices for her lunches.  It's either going to be pb&j or a ham sandwich.  If we've had rice and pnut sauce that week then she'll often choose that.  So, I drink my coffee while I make her lunch and then wake her up around 6:50am.  Often she's already awake and for some horrible reason, Lily is too.  So then we're up.  Phil's up at some point as well but I'm definitely the one running the morning routine show. But for some magical reason, right now, I'm the only one up at 7:01am. Maddie's in a wedding today.  We've never met the bride or ...

Really, how could this city get much better?  I walk out on Thanksgiving morning to take Maddie to the bus stop and it's snowing.  I was already dressed for a run but the sidewalks were too slippery.  So, I decided to hike up the mountain that sits behind our complex.  It was amazing.  I had in my ear buds, listening to Newsboys singing about everything that makes our God so awesome.  In Chariots of Fire, Eric Liddell says to his sister, "...when I run I feel His pleasure."  And on this morning I totally knew what he meant.  It was like I had stepped outside and God said, Julie, I love you so much.  Do you realize that?  Do you realize that the  mountains will crumble at my name, that one day every knee will bow before me and that I love you? Needless to say, it was a good time out. We had 8 local friends over for Thanksgiving supper.  It was good.  It's good to eat good food and be around good people.  I just have ...

Just finished my Monday class.  Two hours of hissing, gargling and sticking my tongue out.  Sounds more like an exorcism.  LZ, my teacher, gave me a 2 1/2 page review towards the end of class and when I got a word or sound just right, she'd have this happy smile that shone through her eyes.  I love that. Monday is Lily's full day of preschool.  She goes without a fuss which makes it so much easier on me.  I'm hoping she doesn't figure out what a push-over I am when it comes to her little sad eyes.  I do miss her on Monday afternoons. Maddie's been planning her 7th birthday for several weeks now.  Now it's less than 2 weeks away.  7 years old.  I have a 7 year old.  Wow. Matt Redman's newest album, 10,000 reasons, is amazing.   Sunshine, blue sky, falling leaves...praises

Many mornings in this country start off with the fresh morning breezes of sewage smell.  This morning is no exception.  No one, at least no one I know, is quite sure of the reason.  There's a rumor that fountain water is recycled sewage water.  There are a lot of fountains in our complex but since my girls and I have played in that water, I'd rather be ignorant and think the smell comes from somewhere else. We have a turkey in our freezer.  Many, many people have not eaten turkey.  In fact, I would dare to say that more people in the world have not eaten turkey than have eaten turkey.  Am I blowing your mind?  Well, most folks here haven't eaten turkey, but they are raised here by some, and have you ever seen a picture of an African eating a turkey leg?  No.  My point exactly.  But, we eat them and so when a friend said the village he was visiting had turkeys running loose, eating whatever they'd like off the land and streets (org...

When your baby is actually a baby, naps are really important.  A baby needs lots of sleep.  It's a bonus for the parents because when the baby rests, we get to rest, too. When your babies aren't so much babies anymore, rest time is really not for the kid at all.  It's totally for the parents.  That's where I'm at today. This morning started with high emotions and hasn't gotten much better.  We're at the tail end of a week holiday and Monday morning is like the light at the end of the tunnel.  There are those moments of sweetness, moments of "ahhh, our children are radiantly glorious" but their shininess quickly fades when the tattling and arguing over who Ken and Barbie belong to, begins.  I know, I know they grow up too fast, cherish these moments, blah, blah, blah.  I usually feel those things once they're peacefully asleep. So, on to other, more uplifting thoughts.  I've been thinking so much about the exploitation of women and child...

So I met my language tutor earlier today for the first time.  I know that I was never this excited/giddy for any of my Chinese classes.  In fact, I was totally overwhelmed this morning with praise just thinking about how this has been a long time coming.  Thankfully, I got all my joyful crying done before my teacher got here.  Nothing spectacular happened during our hour and half together.  We discussed how I want to study and looked through some really good material I had been given.  We started the alphabet...I just stared at her mouth and did my darnedest to copy her.  It was awesome.  I totally suck but it was awesome none the less.  And really, when I think about how nothing spectacular happened here at my dining room table, I can't help but imagine there was a loud shout of rejoicing in the heavens.  Wouldn't you think that when our Father's will is being done here on earth, it is great cause for rejoicing in the realms unseen...

This is, bar none, the best place we've lived in CH.  We've been back for just over 2 months now and it hasn't been rosy everyday but most days have been pretty darn good. ---Amazing to live with moutains in our backyard and every side of the city ---The weather is a sweet treat. - blue skies, thunderstorms and stars ---I love that Lily dances and learns the cutest songs at her CH preschool.  There's this one song in particular.  Ms. Xue plays the piano as each child takes a turn standing in front of all the other kids.  The kids sing a welcome song to that child and at the end the child in front, in a very loud voice and with a little bow, says, "Thank you everyone!"  It is just about the cutest thing on earth to see all these little CH 3 and 4 year olds singing, bowing and thanking their classmates.  Of course, by far, the cutest is the one little blonde 4 year old bowing and thanking in CH. ---Our apartment complex.  It is amazing.  It's a...

So, my hope is to start posting on a regular basis again.  Both the girls are in school - Lily just for half day - and I really want to start writing again.  It's not that I'm incredibly busy, it's just that I don't think about blogging.  I think I'm a little intimidated now too.  I started my first blogs back in 2006 but now there are about half a billion other moms my age that are blogging.  I find that intimidating for some reason. But for now it's time to stop being the blogging mom and be the making breakfast, lunch and everything in between mom.

Well, I'm writing on my blog again.  I've figured out something about myself while living here at Beulah Beach.  When I'm feeling really good about my life, I don't blog very much and I don't run as much.  So, expect a lot more blogging in China and a very fit, trim and ripped Julie!  That sounds awful but it is what it is.  I'd also like to blame my lack of blogging on FB.  I'm not sure how it's related but I'd like to blame it anyway. We travel.  We travel all the time.  When we're in China, we travel.  We travel to Thailand, we travel to other cities in China, we fly to Australia and to America.  When we're here we travel.  We travel to NC, GA, FL, PA, WV, TX...to thousands upon thousands of towns in OH.  On our last trip, which was to WV, Maddie felt like our 5 hr road trip was so short and fun.  That makes me proud. The very best thing about road trips in the good ol' US of A is gas station coffee and mini chocola...

It has been so long since I've experienced a true fall. The leaves and the smells have been magnificent. Truly. I'm always taking deep, deep breaths to get in all that fall leaf smell. The peak color has passed and so the trees are becoming browner and more bare. We've had rain and super strong wind for 2 days now. I love it. I've gone back and forth on if it will be hard to leave the Beach and head to China next summer. With great days like these, I know it will be hard to miss this next year. But I don't know. Maybe our new town will have fall. On Sunday we skipped church and went to the Oak Ridge Festival. It's a festival in Attica OH that showcases everything from cannons and tanks to steam-powered wood splitters. Most of the vendors are scattered through the woods which is unique and a lot of fun to wander through. We all 4 really liked it. Phil and I got homemade wool mittens and Maddie used her allowance money to buy a pink heart bracelet. Lil...

I wish that every morning I woke up this early (I've been awake since 5:06am). I can leisurely make coffee, paint my toenails (random but I did), read some from James (a very convicting book for me over the last few days, especially about my evil tongue), look at a drawing that Katie Stemple did (her parents work at BFA, a boarding school in Germany) and see that she's really creative and detail-oriented (she's a 1st grader and Maddie's BFF). And now I'm blogging. You'd think that since I live at BB and every single day I'm just about knocked over by the beauty and sweetness of God, I'd be blogging like crazy. But I have a greater urge to sit on the porch and stare at the tree in the front yard with the rope swing and the rope ladder. Or I'd rather take my coffee, put on a hoodie and sit by the lake and look out over the seemingly endless miles of water. I really can't get enough of sky, water, trees, grass, leaves, plants, flowers, mud, ...

We've been back in America for just over 2 weeks now. For some reason, I decided that caffeine doesn't really count in sweet tea and I drank too much, too late yesterday afternoon. So now at 3:29am, I'm up and totally awake. Running here is such a joy. I love running through the neighborhoods of Dover. There is this one super steep hill that is so hard but once I turn to run back down, there's this great view over the houses and every time I rejoice in what I can see. I get this really satisfied, happy feeling as I'm running past light pink dogwoods and this one bright, bright purple azalea. I look at the sky and no matter if it's cloudy or sunny, it's so beautiful to me. I'm really glad we are here. Madeleine and Lilian are in and out of the house all day. It's amazing how much a yard does for a kid's spirit. Yesterday evening, they were in the front lawn spinning and laughing as it drizzled. It was so sweet. Life right now is relaxing...

Well my house looks like it did at some point when we moved here about 2 years ago. Boxes lying around, no pictures up, hammers, cleaning rags and tape sitting in random spots around the living room. It's a mess. Another move, more good-byes and mixed emotions. I'm going to miss... ..real CH food whenever I want it for dirt cheap, ..a tailor that made all my curtains and waves to me every time I walk past her shop, ..the little boy who's parents own the light bulb shop and yells, "hello!" every time we pass by, ..all the little kids that very politely say, "Ayi" (Aunt) when they pass me, ..our first friend in Chengdu who owns a local shop and buys birds as a hobby - bird guy, as we call him, ..the best dumpling makers, the steamed bread makers, the shopkeepers that deliver our milk for free and know our address by heart, ..the courtyard of our complex where Maddie can play by herself or with her friends while we keep an eye on her from our 4th floor, ....

I've been thinking about my blog and wanting to write something for awhile now. Maybe its because its the end of the year and I'm thinking back some on all that this year has held. It's impossible not to think of my MS diagnosis. How the year had barely begun and we were running around Chengdu and then Hong Kong looking for answers. The testing in Hong Kong was such a low point. It was the lowest point by far. I remember after the spinal tap I was lying perfectly still and thinking over and over, "This can't be me. This can't be me." And yet it was. The reality of that was just horrible. Then it was to America. It was strange to be so excited about going to America when the reasoning was so tragic. Yet, we were all very excited and it was really a highlight of the year. I loved the food and the air. I loved seeing Madeleine love the front and backyard. We took strolls in the evenings and Sheryl cooked all our meals. I had time to reflect and ...

So it seems that Madeleine has stopped sucking her thumb. Last night was the 1st night we forgot to put the bitter on her thumb but it looked like she had fallen asleep without her thumb in her mouth. She had been reminding us to paint on the bitter if we forgot. Lily no longer uses a pacifier. That was SO much easier than the thumb sucking. The big draw back has been that Lily doesn't like afternoon naps anymore. It started as soon as she didn't have her pacifier. So everyday we have this battle to get her to nap. Sometimes we win and sometimes she does. At night she has no problem sleeping. Yesterday the 4 of us went shopping at Decathlon and IKEA. We needed some winter clothes for the girls because we're going to Kangding next week for 4 days. It's in the mountains. Phil will drive. It takes about 7 hrs to drive there but may take us longer with potty breaks and other stops along the way. Kangding has a strong Tibetan influence. It looks beautiful. We...

So we've been in this process of trying to get Madeleine to stop sucking her thumb for a long, long time now. We actually started trying right after her 3rd bday. She'll be 5 in November. I can't remember when but a while back we got her to stop sucking her thumb during the day. She loved sucking it while reading books or watching something. That was hard to stop but we did it. Then about 2 weeks ago I decided I would try to get her to stop at night. It fell on the same week as Phil being in Hong Kong and Lily giving up her pacifier. She got really excited about stopping because I bought a Barbie kitchen that she could have if she didn't suck her thumb for 3 nights in a row. It was very, very hard but that kitchen was a huge draw for her and so she stopped. Yesterday afternoon she confessed to me that she's been sucking her thumb all along. She had been lying to me/us every day about it. I had my suspicions because for the last few nights when I'd check ...